One girl and one boy is just not enough.
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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