Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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