I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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