hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
