oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
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Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
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