apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize