Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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