The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Randomize