What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
