I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
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all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Randomize
