He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
