Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
