I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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