Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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