I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
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