I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
