Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
