The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
