My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
