hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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