I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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