what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Randomize
