My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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