she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Randomize