she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize