did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
