I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
