last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
