Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize