He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
