DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
29 Unspoken Rules Of “Bro Code”
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants