id be glad to
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
