if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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