Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Ambien. No doubt about it.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
