Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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