Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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