I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
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