32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
