Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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