I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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