I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Randomize