your room smells of hookers.
And success
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
