it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
