I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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