dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
