i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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