just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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