I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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