If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
