Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Randomize
