I'm gonna have a badass scar
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize